Sunrises, Sunsets

At the time of this entry Nell still holds on to life, barely. Her breathing is extremely shallow. The last few times she communicated anything it was pain and a crying out for her mother. We wait.

The following was written by Evelyn, Nell's wonderful daughter, my marvelous wife on December 28, 2008. Evelyn has been the main caregiver now for these 28 days that Nell has been in our home.

Tonight I watched the sun set. The hues of orange, pink, purple & red were brilliantly splattered across the sky in a breathtaking display.

How interesting that sunrises & sunsets share such brilliant colors, announcing their arrival.

Such is life & death. One is ushered in, another out, yet both are brilliantly controlled by the hand of the master artist - God.

Sometime I fear the dark, but without the dark do we really appreciate the light? In heaven I know we will, but in our feeble earthly frames we must have the struggles to see the blessing of His hand walking us through.

When will the sun set on my mother's earthly life? Only God knows, but with the dark, will come light again... and for that I wait.

Resting

It would appear that Nell's medicines are finally reaching the goal. Tonight she is resting much more peacefully than she has been.

Evelyn was able to get out by herself for awhile earlier in the evening. She went to a place of prayer and returned somewhat refreshed.

Dad Steffes experienced Louies Coney Island for the first time yesterday evening. I'm not sure if that was refreshing or just dangerous. Oh, he didn't eat alone. We all three scarfed down hot dogs slathered in mustard, chili, onions and cheese. Yes, we had fries with that. None of us were moving real quick tonight.

All kinds of encouragement has come in from various sources.  Yesterday I received an email from our daughter's mother-in-law. In it she included a couple of quotes:

May today there be peace within.  May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.  May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.  May you be content knowing you are a child of God.  Let his presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.  It is there for each and every one of us.  (Saint Theresa)

Do not complain about thorns among the roses....Give thanks for roses among the thorns.

We all read this email and we wept a bit. It was just the encouragement we needed at the moment. It made me think of a message I preached not long on Peace. Col 3:15 And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.

Two words, well actually the same word in both verses stands out. "Let." The Greek word in verse 15 means to rule and in verse 16 it is Greek for to inhabit. 

The idea is that God's peace is available to all of His children and that peace will rule on the throne of our lives if we will "let" it. The word of God will inhabit us if we "let" it.

How is this done? How do we lay down all the heavy load of life? How do we stop the financial pressures and the health issues from invading our every waking thought? Go to the Word. Stop. Take a breath, a deep, slow breath. Now remember this. Ps 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! Ps 46:11 The LORD of hosts is with us; The God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah 

Now, "let" that thought invade your soul and mind. God is God, not you and certainly not me. Be still and know this truth. That God who is God is with us, that is present in whatever situation you find yourself in. He is there and He will be exalted. He will get glory out of your situation. He is your refuge, that is a place to go and hide and "let" His peace rule on the throne of your heart.

And know this: Ro 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. 

Joh 14:27 "Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. 

My Friend, be at peace. Be at rest.

All Scriptures are from the New King James Translation.

Care Takers

We are taking care of my Mom Steffes, Nell in our home. She has terminal stomach cancer and she is in her final days. It is probably the single most difficult thing I have ever had to watch in my life. Though modern medicine keeps her pain at bay, she is unable to eat or drink anything and keep it down. She has had no nourishment for weeks.

People in our church and community have been wonderful. God has given little blessings all along the way. Those are the things that keep us going.

We rejoice in His goodness and in the fact that she will soon be in His presence. She is ready for that to happen and we all wonder what God's plan is in her tarrying here on this earth.

In a moment when she was anxious yesterday her husband came to her side and started encouraging her with scriptures and talk of heaven. After a few minutes of this she looked up at him and said, "You are wearing me out." Being a preacher, he jokingly asked her, "Do you think that's the way the people in the congregation feel when I'm preaching?" She said, "Yes. That is the lesson you were suppose to learn. That's why I'm still here."

That was a moment of great laughter.

I just got called out to help for a few moments. The hospice nurse just okay ed the increase of her medication to every 3 hours. This is going to be harder on Evelyn. She is doing most of the meds herself. This means less sleep for Evelyn. Mom doesn't want anyone else giving her the meds. She is also wanting Dad at her side most of the time now. We are all tired, longing, waiting, wondering...

We sang Isa 40:31 But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.

We hold to the hope of His promises.